|
以下是一篇蠻有趣的妙論。可得一餐笑。請慢慢笑
==========================================
輕鬆一下吧!
沒錢的時候，養豬；
有錢的時候，養狗。
沒錢的時候，在家裡吃野菜；
有錢的時候，在酒店吃野菜。
沒錢的時候，在馬路上騎自行車；
有錢的時候，在客廳裡騎自行車。
沒錢的時候想結婚；
有錢的時候想離婚。
沒錢的時候老婆兼秘書；
有錢的時候秘書兼老婆。
沒錢的時候假裝有錢；
有錢的時候假裝沒錢。
人啊，都不講實話：
說股票是毒品，都在玩；
說金錢是罪惡，都在撈；
說美女是禍水，都想要；
說高處不勝寒，都在爬；
說煙酒傷身體，就不戒；
說天堂最美好，都不去!!!
當今社會，窮吃肉，富吃蝦，領導幹部吃王八；
男想高，女想瘦，狗穿衣裳人露肉；
過去把第一次留給丈夫；
現在把第一胎留給丈夫。
鄉下早晨雞叫人，
城裡晚上人叫雞；
舊社會戲子賣藝不賣身，
新社會演員賣身不賣藝。
人生是什麼?
只 用 了 4 4 個 字 , 就 把 人 生 講 完 了 . . .
所以 人 與 人 , 有 啥 好 計 較 的 咧 ?
快樂好相處比較重要啦！
1 歲 時 出場亮相
10 歲 時 功課至上
20 歲 時 春心盪漾
30 歲 時 職場對抗
40 歲 時 身材發胖
50 歲 時 打打麻將
60 歲 時 老當益壯
70 歲 時 常常健忘
80 歲 時 搖搖晃晃
90 歲 時 迷失方向
10 0 歲 時 掛在牆上
祝大家愉快，好好做人
您好!!
朋友您好，為了你好，
請您坐好，用心聽好。
錢多錢少，夠吃就好。
人醜人美，順眼就好。
人老人少，健康就好。
家窮家富，和氣就好。
老公晚歸，有回就好。
老婆嘮叨，顧家就好。
孩子從小，就要教好。
博士也好，賣菜也好，
長大以後，乖乖就好。
房屋大小，能住就好。
名不名牌，能穿就好。
兩輪四輪，能駕就好。
老闆不好，要忍就好。
一切煩惱，能解就好。
堅持執著，放下最好。
人的一生，平安就好。
不是有錢，一定會好。
心好行好，命能改好。
誰是誰非，天知就好。
修福修慧，來世更好。
說這麼多，明白就好。
天地萬物，隨緣就好。
很多事情，看開就好。
人人都好，日日都好。
你好我好，世界更好。
總而言之，知足最好。
這條短信，真的很好，
不發給你，是我不好。
發了給你，大家都好！
哈哈！你說我對你好不好？
文章定位：
台長：大溪社會大學
SILVER
STAR MUSIC ACADEMY银星歌唱学院
A99-A，
1st Floor, Jalan Tuanku 2, Taman Salak South,
57100 Kuala Lumpur. www.huatuan.com/kl/silverstar
5-4-2010.
You think you can do better ?
A first-grade
teacher, Ms Tulip (Age 28) was having trouble with one of her students.
The teacher asked,' Boy, what is your problem?'
Boy answered, 'I'm too smart for
the first-grade. My sister is in the third-grade and I'm smarter than she is! I
think I should be in the third-grade too!'
Ms
Tulip had enough. She took Boy. to the principal's office. While Boy.
waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the
situation was. The principal
told Ms Tulip he would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer any of
his questions he was to go back to the first-grade and behave. She agreed.
Boy.
was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the
test.
Principal:
'What is 3 x 3?'
Boy:
'9'.
Principal:
'What is 6 x 6?'
Boy:
'36'.
And
so it went with every question the principal thought a third-grade should
know. The principal looks at Ms Tulip and tells her, 'I think
Boy can go to the third-grade. '
Ms Tulip
says to the principal, 'I have some of my own questions.
Can I ask
him ?' The principal and Boy both agreed.
Ms Tulip
asks, 'What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?
Boy., after
a moment 'Legs.'
Ms Tulip: 'What is in your
pants that you have but I do not have?'
Boy:
'Pockets.'
Ms
Tulip: What starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and
contains thin whitish liquid?
Boy:
Coconut
Ms
Tulip: What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft And sticky? The
principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer, Boy.
was taking charge.
Boy:
Bubblegum
Ms
Tulip: What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog
does on three legs? The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could
stop the answer...
Boy:
Shake hands
Ms
Tulip: Now I will ask some 'Who am I' sort of questions, okay?
Boy:
Yep.
Ms
Tulip: You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me up. I get
wet before you do.
Boy:
Tent
Ms
Tulip: A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored. The best man
always has me first. The Principal was looking restless, a bit tense and took one
large Vodka peg.
Boy:
Wedding Ring
Ms
Tulip: I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you blow me, you
feel good.
Boy:
Nose
Ms
Tulip: I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a quiver.
Boy:
Arrow
Ms
Tulip: What word starts with a 'F' and ends in 'K' that means lot of heat and
excitement?
Boy:
Fire truck
Ms
Tulip: What word starts with a 'F' and ends in 'K' & if u don't get it u
have to use your hand.
Boy:
Fork
Ms
Tulip: What is it that all men have one of it's longer on some men than on
others, the pope doesn't use his and a man gives it to his wife after
they're married?
Boy:
SURNAME
Ms
Tulip: What part of the man has no bone but has muscles, has lots of veins,
like pumping, & is responsible for making love ?
Boy:
HEART.
The
principal breathed a sigh of relief and said to the teacher,
'Send this Boy to OXFORD
UNIVERSITY
EVEN I GOT THE LAST TEN QUESTION WRONG MYSELF'
:-) :-) :-)
www.huatuan.com/ab8/yougoang www.huatuan.com/ab8
20090828 Lim Hong
See 林鸿思 019-3311361 Taman Salak South, Kuala
Lumpur. Malaysia. www.huatuan.com/hongsee
www.huatuan.com/ab8/yougoang www.huatuan.com/ab8
20090828 Lim Hong See
林鸿思 019-3311361 Taman Salak South, Kuala
Lumpur. Malaysia. www.huatuan.com/hongsee
|